The Pressures of Christmas

I will admit that I am having a hard time with Christmas this year. I’m not sure why that is. There are probably a lot of reason which are too involved and whiny to delve into here. But I think the main reason has to do with being preoccupied with many other things. I think that we put too much pressure on ourselves at Christmas time. I have always loved Christmas. I usually begin listening to certain Christmas music long before the Michigan snow flies. Yet, it does bother me when retailers begin their holiday commercial blitzkrieg earlier every year. Their purpose is clear: to get us in the mood to spend by foreshadowing the coming of their idea of Christmas. Yet, what kind of Christmas do the prophets of commerce announce?

Hundreds of years before His birth, prophets of God also foreshadowed the coming of Christ. Isaiah announced “Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel.” (7:14) Through the prophets, God detailed many aspects of Messiah’s arrival with great accuracy. Yet, a baby born in poverty and relative obscurity wasn’t exactly what the faithful had hoped for in their Messiah. They wanted one who would grant them political power, prestige, and material blessings. The prophets spoke in tasteful muted tones of a Messiah who would bring peace, forgiveness, and a restored relationship with God. The Israelites longed for the bright, crass, commercial appeal of a political conqueror.

As I said, I love a good Christmas celebration draped with lights, garland, gifts, Bing Crosby and Jimmy Stewart. Yet, so much of our modern celebration and expectation of Christmas stems from Charles Dickens’ novella A Christmas Carol. Interestingly, a story meant to lead us into a deeper understanding of the season has become an unwitting accomplice to its commercialization and trivialization. Christmas simply can’t withstand the weight of our expectations leading, often, to depression and disillusionment.

Our celebration of Christmas can be a good and joyful reminder of the Savior’s birth. Beautiful decorations, gifts, celebration, and traditions are all appropriate if kept in perspective. Yet, we need to make sure that we don’t have unrealistic expectations of Christmas based on movies, Norman Rockwell paintings, or books. The Israelites didn’t recognize the birth of their Savior because of misplaced expectations. There is no perfect Christmas, only a perfect Christ

(Based on an article I wrote for the December 13, 2009 issue of “The Lookout” magazine. Reprinted with permission)

Endurance, Perseverance, and Rush

I have been reflecting on how hard it is to keep at something for a long time—to keep my nose to the grindstone week in and week out. The word for it is endurance. Whether it’s reading God’s Word, studying hard in school, remaining faithful in marriage, or performing your ministry for the Lord week in and week out, it’s hard to keep doing something—anything—when everything in you wants to quit. However, the older I get and the longer I am in ministry the more convinced I am that it’s all about endurance! Life and ministry is about finishing well. I love seeing new believers come to faith in Christ. One Sunday last spring we baptized and welcomed into the church family some sixteen people. It was a great day! But I’ll get more fired up to see each of them twenty and thirty years down the road still serving and loving God, still running the race marked out for them, still persevering and enduring in their faith.

Hebrews 12 says “…let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus . . . who for the joy set before him endured the cross . . . consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.”

Those words: endurance and perseverance. I love those words. I love what they stand for. I love what they mean. But I also hate those words because I see in them so many of my failures and weaknesses. If Jesus embodies endurance and perseverance, I too often stand cowering in their shadow. Yet, we are told to follow Jesus’ model in this regard. We are to run the race with endurance so that we can finish. Too many folks start out great in their Christian walk. They spring off the starting block a blur of motion. Many marvel and wonder at their dedication, their activity, their faith. They are sprinters in a race best suited for the long distance marathoner. And, all too often, when things get difficult and God doesn’t seem to want to behave the way they think He should, they run out of steam. They burnout. They quit. They take their eyes off Jesus and forget that it’s all about the finish. Disillusionment sets in. And they drop out of the race.

Recently, God has been teaching me about endurance and perseverance when things get tough.

Many moons ago I loved to run. The last time I lost significant weight was about 17 years ago. I did it partially by running. With the years came the excess weight and somewhere along the line I couldn’t run anymore. So one of my goals with my current weight loss has been to get back running. Over the last year I have spent a lot of time on my treadmill but most of it was walking for fear of messing up my feet or knees. But that has been my goal. About a month ago I found that I can actually start running again. And it felt good. So little by little I began running again.

That brings me to a few days ago. I was on the treadmill. It was late at night. I couldn’t sleep so I strapped on my iPod, cranked up Rush, and started running. I didn’t really want to at first. I had to force myself to get on the thing. The first half mile or so was rough but not because I was out of breath or in pain. I just would have rather sat down and ate some ice cream. But I ran through it. Now, for those of you who are hard core runners, my accomplishment in this regard is small in comparison to yours. But for a guy who got out of breath getting off the couch just 15 months ago, this is a big thing. So that night I kept running.

I ran with Rush through Subdivisions and raced with the Red Barchetta. I ran with the Working Man pounding in my ears and I and Flew By Night like an owl. Nearing the two mile mark I felt great, like a New World Man. My adrenaline was pumping, and endorphins were coursing through my body and mind. My breathing was heavy but controlled and rhythmic as Rush screamed through Limelight. But at about the two and a half mile mark I got a Distant Early Warning of trouble. A pain shot through my left calf and disappeared as quickly as it came. “Just a distraction,” I thought as Tom Sawyer pulled me back into my rhythmic stride. But it came back and it hurt.

Now by this time I had been on the treadmill for about 30 minutes. This doesn’t seem like a long time when you’re zipping through an episode of Monk on the Tivo. But when your pounding it out on the treadmill it’s a long time. And so when I felt this throbbing pain in my calf, everything in me said “Quit. It’s okay. Two and a half miles is not bad.” Only problem was that I had determined to run three and a half miles—a distance I had not run in eighteen years. To quit would have made me a . . . well, a quitter. So I kept running through the pain. Did I mention it hurt?

But an amazing thing happened. After about another quarter mile, the pain disappeared and I began to feel . . . amazing. I could have kept going indefinitely (well at least until I collapsed and had to be air lifted to Hurley Medical Center).

But I worked through it. I didn’t give up. I didn’t let the pain dictate my actions. I kept going and it went away and I felt great. I persevered and I endured through the pain.

Let’s face it. Sometimes life is hard. And it can be very appealing to quit and walk away. I don’t care what the issue is. It’s hard and not very much fun, at times, to persevere and endure. There will be pain and at times it seems that it’s all just running on a treadmill sweating and cramping but going nowhere. But life is a marathon not a wind sprint. I want to finish strong, steady, and with an even stride when I round life’s last turn. I want to be like Jesus who endured and persevered through physical and emotional pain the likes of which we can’t imagine. All of this so we could think of Him and be reminded that there was once a Man Who didn’t give up when it got tough. There was a Man Who did persevere. Who endured. And Who will be the first to catch us as we break the tape when we cross the final finish line.

And it will be so worth it.

Jamaica, Applebee’s, and God’s Provision

In just a couple weeks I, along with several others from our church, will be headed to Scots Pass Jamaica on a mission trip. I am excited and just received an email from “brother Jerry” the pastor of the church. I am preaching at the church which will be my first experience preaching outside of the country. I asked him if he had any suggestions and he suggested I preach something appropriate for Father’s Day. I was relieved to know that they celebrate Father’s Day and will do just that. We will be conducting Vacation Bible School for the kids and helping in a construction project while there. I don’t feel we are ready, but then I guess we will never feel ready. We are leaving Owosso at about 3am on Friday, June 19th, to fly out of Detroit. We will be arriving back home around 1am on Sunday, June 28th. I have been amazed and blessed with the monetary support given by many people to finance this trip. God does provide for us.

I was reminded of a couple of examples of this from about a year ago.

One Sunday I preached on the subject of moral purity and divorce—a necessary and important topic as we were winding our way through the Sermon on the Mount. But it’s not usually a favorite one to preach on. However, that was the text for the day and I did my best and felt as though I did an ok job with it. But for some reason that message was used by God to do some incredible things. Immediately after church that day I received several heartfelt words of affirmation. I received a note in the mail from an older member who expressed her feeling that God was especially honored through that preaching of His Word. But the best was a visit later that week from a member who told me an amazing story of how God had touched her life through that message. Understand, the focus here is on how God works through His Word in spite of the human clay pot doing his best to preach it.

And so the next Sunday, I was highly encouraged as I stepped to the pulpit to continue preaching from the Sermon on the Mount. The message was a fairly easy, non controversial passage on being honest and trustworthy. I felt pretty good about the message and it started off well. But in my estimation the message began to flat line fairly soon after takeoff.

My wife, who is usually too generous in the post sermon critique that I usually drag out of her, said that it wasn’t all that bad. Yet, I was not happy with it. It just didn’t feel right to me. I also need to tell you the other part of the story. I had really wrestled that morning with our tithe. The previous week was very hectic and I hadn’t had time to balance our checkbook and things were tight. I will confess I was tempted to not give and try to make it up next Sunday. Also, we were scheduled to provide lunch for our intern and his girlfriend. I had thought we would go to Applebee’s after church. Have you ever felt that hesitancy as you drag your pen across the check? I did that Sunday. But I got over it and wrote the check. So after church I wasn’t feeling great about my message and I was wondering if there’s enough in our checking account to pay for lunch. There really wasn’t a lot of time to move some over from our savings.

Right when I was done preaching and Thadd was closing the service I had to run to my office to get something. And there on my desk was big thick envelope. In the envelope was an anonymous card which just showered affirmation and appreciation on Lori and I for our ministry here. But also in the envelope were two gift cards to Applebee’s for more than enough to pay for lunch at the very restaurant I had already decided to go to. I had not said a word to anyone about our lunch plans. Isn’t God so awesome!

God is so trustworthy and will always provide for us whatever we need—whether it’s hope, encouragement, or Applebee’s gift cards.

Almost a Year!

OK-it’s been a long time since I posted. This was brought to my attention by the thousands of, if not two, people who read my blog. In any event, I am quickly approaching the year anniversary of my Lapband surgery to lose weight. A year ago at this time, I was anxiously awaiting a call from Hurley Bariatric to give me a surgery date. A year ago at this time I also weighed close to 340 pounds, though that is a guestimate because I was afraid to weigh myself and for some reason the scores of doctors I had to see prior to surgery didn’t record my weight. But I believe it was pretty close to that. If you have read my posts from around that time you’ll know why I wanted to have the surgery and my thoughts at that time. Basically, I felt horrible had beginning diabetes, sleep apnea, high blood pressure, killer acid reflux, and various and sundry other problems. But mostly I was just tired of being so big.

People ask me if it was hard or easy. Others say to me “oh, you took the easy way to lose weight.” I understand what they mean, but there is nothing easy about any method of losing weight. Everyone is different but for me the lapband procedure was and is the best choice. But it was not and is not easy in some ways. In other ways it is easy. Let me explain.

It’s easy in the sense that the physical feeling of being hungry is not much of a factor with the Lapband. So the temptation to eat out of physical hunger is not much of an issue. And any time I do feel hungry (actual hunger, not emotional hunger) it takes very little food to make that feeling go away. In this regard it’s awesome. But we all know that most overweight people eat not out of physical hunger but for emotional or other reasons. That is what has been hard. There were times I just wanted (and still do occasionally) to just chow down to feel better. No can do! Or if you do, you’ll pay some pretty scary consequences. There was an emotional dependence on food that I always knew was there, but was amazed at how strong it was. I say “was” because it’s pretty much gone now. Not being able to eat and enjoy regular meals with family or with friends is kind of a drag. But I have learned how to deal with that. The other easy thing is that with the Lapband, keeping the weight off will be much easier. Really the only way to gain weight is if I get the band loosened, get it taken out, or drink too many Starbuck’s Venti Mocha Frapaccinos. But there is really no way to eat too much with the band tightened as much as mine is. I have heard of people who have lost very little weight, but those folks eat too much ice cream and drink too many other calorie laden foods.

But the Lapband is also not easy and is not an easy quick fix to losing weight. For starters, there seems to be little rhyme or reason to how much or what kinds of foods I can eat. One day I might be able to eat a fairly regular meal (small portions, of course). And the next day I will get sick trying to eat a dab of macaroni and cheese. When I say sick I don’t mean nauseous, but sort of a sick feeling when the food will not get down my esophagus and just sort of sits there. When this happens your stomach sends this thick, foamy mucousy stuff to try and digest it. This is particularly fun when you are sitting next to someone who is trying to talk with you or when this happens right before you are supposed to get up and speak at a banquet. When this happens there are only two options: Try and wait it out and see if it goes down or try to get it out. Both of which are horrible. This has not happened in a while because I am much, much more cautious. But it still happens. Not too long ago Lori and I went out after church and I just took a couple bites, chewed them well, etc. But I ended up in the bathroom at Ruby Tuesdays for over an hour trying to deal with my digestive issues. Interestingly, I learned some weird things with my extended bathroom stay. For instance, it’s amazing how many people talk to themselves while in the bathroom.

So that is definitely not easy. Also, trying to get all your supplements figured out is quite a headache. I have to take about 6 supplements a day plus i have to make sure I get enough protein either with regular food or with yet more supplements. The vitamins and the calcium supplements are ones you chew and they’re disgusting. I have not been the best about taking them. I have been diligent in my protein because I am worried about my hair falling out. But the vitamins and calcium have been hit or miss until recently. I have been feeling off and went to the doctor yesterday to get some blood workordered. I suspect it will show that my B 12 is off as well as other things. So I am getting on the stick about that. But it’s a pain.

Also, the Lapband can be somewhat discouraging for the first few months. LB patients do not lose as fast as bypass patients. The band can only be filled at set intervals and really until you get 5-7 cc in your band (depending on the size band you have) the restriction is sometimes very minimal. Also, for the first few months you’re still in withdrawal and maybe a little rebellion and it’s very hard to lose consistently. But for me around the 6 month mark (Christmas ironically) things seemed to kick in. Mentally I was stronger and I had a couple fills right before and right after Christmas that seemed to be the magic “green zone” they call it. Right now, I would be content to not try and eat anything because I just don’t think about it any more. My addiction to fast food is totally gone. Occasionally, I’llhave a little craving for something sweet but after a few tastes it loses it’s appeal and I’m done. In the past when i have tried to diet, I would get a voracious craving for sweets. Around this time of year I would down a whole pack of Reese’s peanut butter eggs and not think twice. But it can kind of be discouraging for the first few months as one goes through the emotional ramifications of a forced withdrawal from food addiction. It’s rough.

But when the weight starts coming off and people really begin noticing and telling you how much better you look, it’s the most awesome feeling. There is nothing better than putting on clothes that previously didn’t fit or were very tight and having them be loose. And then there is just feeling better. As I close in on the year anniversary date in about two months I have lost close to 70 pounds. I’m about half way to my realistic goal. But I feel a hundred percent better. My blood pressure is normal, I no longer have any acid reflux and haven’t taken Nexium in over 5 months. I don’t have sleep apnea any more and put away the dreaded CPap machine for good! I am awaiting lab tests but am sure that my blood sugar is in the normal range. I no longer worry about booth size at restaurants. I bought my last item of overpriced, junky clothes at the Fatguy store. Last night I raced my daughter home from church. There are just tons of ways that I feel better. Though i still have a ways to go, the ways in which a 70 pound weight loss is beneficial are astounding.

Last Saturday Lori and I went to an outlet mall. Usually there are no bargains to be found at outlet stores for overweight people. But I went into the Izod store and, right off the rack, I bought three awesome shirts which actually fit me. The total cost for the three Izod shirts was only 30 bucks. I used to pay twice as much as that for 1 shirt. A seemingly small thing for most people. But for me it was a huge victory and foreshadowing of many more to come!

If Not Us, Then Who?

“Doesn’t anybody know what Christmas is all about?” asks Charlie Brown in the classic animated show A Charlie Brown Christmas. This has been my favorite Christmas show ever since I can remember. Being a jazz fan I love the music by jazz legend Vince Guaraldi. As much as the show is a holiday staple (and cash cow for CBS), it almost didn’t make it to the airwaves in 1965. The two producers who worked closely with Charlie Brown creator Charles Schultz tried desperately to convince a network to show the special originally. All the major networks were hesitant. Finally, one agreed, and the great cartoonist got to work.

Executive producer Lee Mendelson says that CBS network executives hated the show when they viewed a rough cut of it in November of that year. “They said it was slow,” says Mendelson, who, along with animator Bill Melendez, told Schulz, “You can’t read from the Bible on network television.” Schulz’s desires prevailed, however, and the simple cartoon special garnered an unbelievable 50 percent of the nation’s viewers that first year. It went on to win both an Emmy and a Peabody award. Pop Culture experts affirm that the program, now considered an icon, draws strength from its back-to-the-basics approach.

A memorable and moving part of A Charlie Brown Christmas occurs when the cartoon character Linus strolls to center stage and reads the biblical account of the meaning of Christmas in response to Charlie Brown’s plaintive cry to understand the true meaning of Christmas. The two producers working with Schultz cautioned him about putting something like that in the special, because they were convinced it wouldn’t go over well. Charles Schultz faced both of the producers and said, “If not us, then who’s going to do it?”

If we, as God’s people, are not going to demonstrate the meaning of Christmas in our lives and in our celebration, then who will? In contrast to the opinions and dictates of powerful people, Charles Schultz insisted on maintaining the biblical account as the central theme of his show. Consider our culture today—many times more hostile to the true meaning of Christmas than that of the 60’s. Are you maintaining the central Truth of Christ in your celebration this year? If not us, then who’s going to do it? Who are you telling about the Christ of Christmas this year? If not you, then who?